Redemption
by beautiful000enigma
Summary: Shante has sworn to live on and has joined the Black Order. Though her innocence may prove useful,her dark past and ominous future can either save them all or be their destruction,unless a certain red haired exorcists can intervene.LavixOC R&R please.
1. Intro: And so I live

**A/N : Hey!! I'm new to this site, though I've read some stories on here before. This is my first D. Gray Man fanfic, so it may be a little rough lol. I'm open to any words of encouragement as well as criticism (there's a difference between that and being an ass). I hope you enjoy it.**

**Warning: T for mature language, sexual content, and violence. Rating will go up to M later (I'm sure of it). **

_Indicates a flashback, dream, or past thoughts_

_Indicates current thoughts _

**Disclaimer: I don't own D. Gray Man or any of its characters. (sadly)**

**_Redemption _**

You've died while I've had to face my sins

So die.

My soul died along time ago

_Stillness_

_Stillness. Clouded thoughts. Pain beyond measure. Blurred eyes. Blood..._

_Slender hands reached out desperately, trying to keep him from falling. She grabbed hold of his now blood stained white shirt, but his dead weight pulled her to the ground along with his near lifeless form. Between gasped breaths and panting, their eyes managed to find each others; a brilliant green finding deep brown. Through trembling lips smeared with blood that did not belong to her, the girl managed to choke out_

_"Don't die."_

_Her voice was raspy and her throat dry. His hand found her trembling face, even at a time like this, she didn't want to seem weak and tried to hold back tears._

_"Its okay, Bumble Bee," he whispered, calling her by the name he had given her when they were young. Tear glazed eyes stared down at him, while the growing warmth of blood spread over him. By now his body was numb and the knife wounds that cut do deeply in his torso seemed to gor wider. Breathing was starting to become harder and more painful. The air burned his lungs; he was pretty sure the knife had cut into one of them._

_Her wall finally crumbled and streams of tears fell rapid, when malicious laughter broke out a few yards ahead of them._

_"Hehe," a playful innocent like grin spread across his pale face. "I told you, I won't let him have you" he spoke in a sing sing voice, his head tilting side to side, eyes, unblinking._

_"Shut up!" she trembled, her body and mind unable to handle the scene she had been thrown into. She turned her attention back to him, fearing that he has slipped away in that brief moment. She cradled him, his body partially in her lap, blood staining her dress._

_She examined him; his flawless caramel skin was smeared with blood, his childish yet handsome face no longer had it usual brightness, and his curly sandy brown hair had fallen from its usual tight ponytail. The only thing that remained the same was his unusual and brilliant eyes that gazed into her own. He was dying, but his eyes had never been so alive, she found terror in the way they seemed to welcome death._

_"Don't leave me here alone," she cried squeezing his hand._

_He smiled, "You'll never be alone." A small stream of blood poured from his mouth, as his wounds grew worse. " But..its too late Bumble Bee,"_

Shante jerked out of her sleep. It took her a moment to remember where she was. She stared around the quiet train compartment, relieved that no one had noticed her awkward behavior. General Klaud had been too preoccupied tending to her cute, yet irritating monkey while General Zokalo frowned, looking out the window. This was only the second time the girl had seen him without his hideous mask on

Shante moved from her comfortable sleeping position to see clearly out the window. The grey sky, fog, and drizzle of London made the city seem so humdrum and sad. The weather brought her nothing but boredom which left her with nothing but her own thoughts. Shante left to her own thoughts, usually wasn't a good thing. That's what had led to her dream, or what she liked to call, her "life's nightmare"

She shuddered as she remembered the sound of his twisted voice and sick smile when he looked at her with cruel eyes...how he laid helpless in her arms... the way her last hope had been taken from her... the smell...and the feel...of blood.

Had she been weaker the mere though of the event that took place close to a year ago would have sent her into unstoppable tears. Now all she felt was an ache in her heart, where something was missing. But she pushed the feeling aside. She had to be strong. Strong for him.

Starting a new life at the Black Order, would be where she began. It would be strange. In fact, before a couple of months ago, Innocence, exorcists, akuma, Noah and the Millennium Earl, where things she would have condemned any one crazy for believing in. That was before she had met the two generals who realized she was compatible with the innocence.

"Shante," a deep rough voice called out, pulling her back from the depths of her own mind. She played with the thin sleeves of her shirt and flicked a piece of lint from her brown skin.

"Yes"

"Your daydreamin again,"

She smiled "I know, I get lost in my own thoughts occasionally"

The massive man scrunched his nose and crossed his arms before looking out the window again, "Umph..daydreamin is for fools"

She felt her smile fade and frowned. Glaring at the man, she replied

"Excuse me?" Her sharp tongue ready to attack

Zokalo chuckled and set his lips to talk.

"Winters leave her alone," Klaud spoke, finally entering the conversation.

The young woman felt slightly irritated; her "dream" along with Winters entire presence ( she never cared for the man much) and the ridiculously grey and foggy day had her nerves on end.

"That's it?" Shante asked slightly leaning forward, neck stretched, and curious brown eyes squinted to see how far the dark and dimly lit underground canal went.

A something sharp and hard pressed on her head, followed by laughter, "No stupid, this just leads to the Order. She frowned, but bit back the angry remark that played on her tongue.

The three clambered in the the small yet sturdy boat, similar to a gondola, held in position by a rope tightly wound about a thick pole rising from the end of the dock. The finder sent to wait for them stood in the boat holding the paddle and smiling.

"Welcome back Generals, and greetings, new exorcists," he said with a bow before turning to untie the rope.

The young Black girl sighed, not knowing whether to be relieved or scared at her quickly approaching new life. The more the finder paddled, the quicker she felt her heartbeat becoming. Twisting the golden diamond ring on her finger, a smile graced her face, if it be from pleasure and happiness she could not tell, it may have been her trying to hide her uncertainty as the end of her journey quickly approached in the form of a vast stone staircase.

_But this isn't the end yet. Its far from it. _She thought to herself. _It's just the beginning. _This was the road she would take for all her sins and the blood that stained her soul.Closing her eyes, she breathed in the scent of water and wet stone as the boat drew closer to its destination, only a few yards away.

This was her start at a new life.

_Live..._

Everything in the past...

_Live..._

Everything that had broken her...

_Live for me.._

Everything that had condemned her...

_Live for what we had _

She wanted to leave in the past. She had promised to live, promised to look forward and be strong.

_Live_the memory of his voice played in her mind along with her promise as she climbed the endless staircase to the Black Order, the two Generals aheads of her.

Klaud turned when they reached the door, facing the young girl who stood with shinning eyes.

"Well Shante, welcome to the Black Order" as she pushed against the doors.

The girl smiled as light enveloped her from inside, still twisting the ring on her finger and thought sweetly

_I will live. This will keep me alive and I will live for you and you alone._


	2. Welcome to the Black Order revised

**A/N : Hey guys I'm back!! Sorry it took me a while to update but I been real busy with work and everything so I haven't really had time but I'll try to update waaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyy more often than this. if you have any questions about the story and such feel free to ask me or if ya got some suggestions tell me.**

**blueballad: Thanx for the review and I'm glad that you like it so far :)**

**Disclaimer: **

** Lavi: clears throat and screams BEAUTIFUL000ENIGMA DOES NOT OWN D.GRAY MAN!! **

** Me: Thank you Lavi**

** Allen: ehem you forgot to mention the characters**

** Lavi: Oh yeah screams SHE ALSO DOES NOT OWN ANY OF THE D.GRAY MAN CHARACTERS**

** Me: sighs sadly tear**

**_Redemption _**

_So die_

_My soul died a long time ago_

_It didn't die_

_It did_

_Its just lost, you need to find it_

Lenalee raced down the hall to meet their new comrade

Lenalee raced down the hall to meet their new comrade. It had been so long since they found any new exorcists and they were in dire need of some, especially after the terrible events with the earl. She slid around the corner and knocked down an unsuspecting Allen.

"Oomph," the white haired teen landed with a thud.

"Ooh, sorry Allen-kun," Lenalee blushed before reaching out a hand to him.

"Its okay, Lenalee," he pulled himself. "What are you in such a hurry for?"

"Oh," she blinked, "No one told you? A new exorcist is coming!

Allen's face fell blank. He frowned and scratched his head, "No" he pouted.

Allen was often left oblivious during certain times.

The Asian girl chuckled. "C'mon, let's go meet here."

'Her?' Allen thought silently. Apart from Lenalee the only other female exorcist he knew were Miranda and General Klaus.

"Ah, my dear little Lenalee" Komui cooed, coffee in hand, as they approached the entrance to the canal. "You've come to welcome Shante' too?" the scientist quirked.

"Shante" Allen pondered, "sounds French." He could almost imagine a French beauty, with pale skin, long flowing hair and an intoxicating accent. A smile crept across his face.

"Where's Lavi and Kanda, nii-san,' Lenalee asked. The supervisor shrugged, "Lavi's helping with decorations and Kanda…just being Kanda."

"Ooh Ooh, I hear them. She's heeerrreee!" Komui cried, jumping excitedly.

"Nii-san"

"Komui"

The other two shook their heads in disappointment.

Allen felt his jaw drop as he laid eyes on the girl for the first time. She wasn't French at all. It wasn't the first time he had meet a Black girl before, but she was…

Amazingly beautiful.

She had soft brown skin and a warm beautiful face. Her thick hair was plaited down and fell over her shoulder, stopping between her navel and chest. Despite the looseness of her dress, it was apparent that she had a wonderful figure, Lipstick played on her face and ornate earrings adorned her tiny ears.

Lenalee nudged him to bring him back to reality. "Hi I'm Lenalee Lee; it's a pleasure to meet you."

Shante' smile at the friendly teen. "I'm Shante' nice to meet you too"

Komui pulled his sister into a bear hug, "I, the wonderful scientist and your supervisor, am Komui and this is my dear little, precious sister." he piped.

'Sister Complex huh?' Shante thought and smiled.

Allen blushed and scratched his head while introducing himself. Shante took note of his slightly feminine and strange appearance, especially the scar on his left eye, but said nothing, nor let it show that she had seen it.

A golden flash whizzed by her, circled Allen head before landing gently in his hair. She twitched and tilted her head slightly to get a better look at the flying "thing." It was similar to the ones she had seen with the two generals, who had long since gone about their business, yet it was completely different. For it was larger, cuter, and seemed to have a "mind of its own."

"It's so cute, yet different," Shante' mused, as Tim flew around her. "Kind of like you Allen." She had always been one to speak her mind and felt she had the God given right to do so.

Allen felt his face flush. Cute? Me? "Th- Thanks" he muttered. The older girl smiled, before poking his forehead. "Don't be so shy, I'm the one that's new here."

Lenalee smiled

"These are the rooms, yours is two doors down from mine," Lenalee pointed out. Shante was amazed at the vastness of the place. Their seemed to be numerous numbers of floors, and looking over the balcony, Shante' shuddered at the thought of how far the fall would be.

"Wow" she mumbled. A near by door flew open and a young Japanese, brandishing a sword walked out and headed in their direction. Shante' gaped at how astonishingly beautiful "she" was.

"Oh Kanda," Lenalee grabbed his arm.

"What?" he huffed. Shante blinked when "she" turned out to be a "he"

"This is Shante our new exorcists. Shante this is Yuu Kanda," Lenalee beamed. Shante' glanced over him. He was thin yet muscular, with strong yet ridiculously girlish features, especially his hair which was slightly longer that her own. She thought he would be even more beautiful if it wasn't for the scowl on his face.

"Hello nice to meet you," she placed a small grin on her face.

"Same now excuse me," Kanda said, trying to be somewhat "polite" toward the girl.

Shante' frowned, "Well, you don't have to be so damn rude" Lenalee gaped and Kanda, somewhat taken back, turned to walk away.

"Che"

Shante frowned, "Is he always like that?" Lenalee sighed before frowning and nodding her head.

"Kanda' just Kanda. Anyways here's your room. Change into the clothes in there, then come to the cafeteria." After telling her how to get to the cafeteria, Lenalee left with a smile, she could tell things were in for a change at the order.


	3. Darkness equals Freedom

**A/N I plan on adding this chapter, along with at least another one (hopefully) this week. I'm really in the writing mood and seemed to be very motivated. **

**blueballad: thank you for the advice and help. You couldn't have read my mind better about the whole "Mary Sue" thing nor picked a more perfect times to say it lol.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything (especially D. Gray Man). sigh Oh how I wish I did.**

**_Redemption_**

_It didn't die_

_It did_

_Its just lost, you need to find it_

_I don't want it_

_Then how can you live?_

_I still have a heart._

Shante' fell back on the small, yet rather comfortable bed and sighed.

"Finally," she sighed.

A quick glance around the room told her that she would add a few personal and sentimental decorations, the little amount that she did have.

Standing up, she pulled a bundle of cloth from her bag. Undoing the multiple white folds, a medium size picture behind a glass frame was revealed. Placing it gently on the desk, she smiled and ran her fingers along the mahogany frame. The picture had been of her and Christopher at their party.

His bright smile and eyes and her long hair and beautiful face grew attention immediately. They were young but in love. His arm was tightly wrapped around her while she draped an arm around him tenderly.

She withdrew from the desk and changed into the clothes Lenalee mentioned. She had noticed the other girl had worn similar attire. Shante's suit consisted of long sleeves top with a big portion of the back gone. The pants felt tight around her hips and thighs, but fell loose toward the ankles.

The young girl examined herself in the mirror while tucking the pants into her heeled boots. Twisting this way and that, she smiled slightly. Her smile fell somewhat when she turned her back toward the mirror and found herself staring at the intricate and huge tattoos on her back.

"I guess there was no other way," she sighed before quickly undoing her plaits and let her hair fall down to cover her back.

Though she exuded confidence with her entire being there was much that she felt self conscious about, especially her left arm. Grabbing her wrist and feeling the bareness of her skin along with the ragged, one -year- old vertical scar, Shante rummaged through her bag to find the thick bangle she wore to hide, what she called, the "mark of her true self"

_"She really made a mess of things here," an unknown voice mumbled._

_White light seemed to flow from everywhere, swallowing her in its glow. _

_"Sad really, so beautiful, but looks can be deceiving," a second voice agreed. Blinking left than right, the girl saw unfamiliar faces. Not that she was surprised, her future held no familiarity in it anymore. Hands moved quickly around her and she began to recognize a sharp , yet dull pain in her left arm._

_"Wonder what made her do this... its a sin you know, taking ones life," the second voice stated, oblivious to her waking up._

_The first doctor sighed and shook his head, " Who knows, but she didn't want to die too much...she cut the wrong way."_

Shante snorted pushing her thoughts to the back of her mind, feeling slightly unnerved at how quickly her past could rush back into her mind after she had fought so long to keep it at bay. A tingling sensation flowed from her scar to the rest of her arm when she snapped her bangle on. That memory had awaken so many feelings. A slight grin appeared on her face out of pity as she recalled the excitement, rush of energy, and happiness that flowed through her that night when she saw the blood flowing from her arm.

_More, let me see more._

_Bleed out all the pain._

"Hmph," Shante' grimaced in the mirror, seeing not the beautiful person everyone else saw, but instead a sinful, twisted, and faithless woman.

_I wasn't always like this, but my love for you is what corrupted me, Christopher _

Shante shook her head and hid behind her facade once again, before opening the door to leave.

"WELCOME HOME!!" numerous amounts of exorcists, finders, and scientists yelled in unison. Shante' had jumped back in surprise and clasped her chest, close to where her broach was.

"Shit," she was muttered, before smiling. "All this is for me?" she asked gleaming at the beautiful decorations, the smiling faces, and the wonderful array of food.

"Of course," Lenalee said bringing pastries over. "Your apart of our family now."

_The French woman smiled, letting tears fall freely from her eyes, while she cradled the young girl, her son putting his small comforting arms around them both._

"_Tsk' ,ssshh, you are too wonderful to cry. You never have to cry again." the older woman spoke, her French accent thick._

"_Ma'ma, what's going to happen to her?" a young curious boy asked his mother. She smiled and kissed both their foreheads._

"_Nothing, I'll let nothing happen to her," she promised. "Worry no more, you'll be with us from no on. We won't let anything happen to you, your apart of our family now"_

Shante smiled and gladly took them from Lenalee. Kanda stood nearby, still scowling, while Allen, despite his small frame, was greedily eating multiple pieces of everything.

"Yuu-chan!!" a rather awkward high pitched voice yelled. Anyone near by saw Kanda twitch.

"Baka usagi," Kanda grunted unsheathing Mugen.

A young man around the same age as Kanda, yet slightly taller, with fiery red hair and a head band held up his hands in defense.

"Calm down Yuu, it's a party, live a little," the red head joked. "So where the new chick? Allen said she was really…"

He turned and caught sight of Shante and mentally yelled "Strike!" numerous times. His crooked smile fell on his face.

"Hi I'm Lavi," he managed to say and held out a hand. The girl, distracted by his bright hair, finally saw his playful yet handsome face.

"Shante'" she smiled with a pastry filled cheek and took his hand. Lavi bowed and placed a kiss on the back of her hand. Lifting his head, she was a little taken back when she saw the eye patch, Not wanting to stare her eyes flew to his uncovered one.

Her heart skipped a beat when her eyes caught his remarkably green one. His one beautiful eyes made her turn her head in embarrassment. She had only known one other person with such green eyes.

Lavi stared, unblinking, "Wow," he blurted, "and you have a great body to boot" As soon as the words escaped his lips, he clapped a hand over his mouth.

"Lavi!" both Allen and Lenalee said in unison. Kanda shook his head slightly.

The new girl didn't know whether to feel irritated, angry, or take it as a compliment, so she arched an eyebrow and swallowed her food.

"Really? Your staring awfully hard then aren't you," she replied coyly with a smirk.

Lavi smiled, glad that she hadn't taken him to be some sort of a pervert for looking so much. He was glad that she could possibly be someone he could possibly joke and get along with.

"Yeah, sorry about that," the red head scratched his cheek before grinning widely.

His grin was intoxicating and soon she found herself smiling. "Its okay"

Shante found herself twisting the ring on her finger again while she looked away, breaking eye contact with the teen and turning her attention to the ill mannered samurai.

"So Kanda, where are you from?"

Kanda folded his arms, "Che. Japan"

"Wow if you weren't a guy, I'd think you were on your period, "Shante blurted, irritated by his tone as she had a short temper and even less patience for those who irritated her.

Allen gulped down a piece of sushi, "Don't worry, this is nothing. He's normally in permanent PMS mode."

"Screw you moyashi" Kanda hissed, glaring at the young man.

"See told you so"

Shante chuckled genuinely before turning back to Lavi who had taken a sudden liking to the nearby wall, trcing his finger over it in no particular pattern.

"I'm pretty sure the wall would appreciate it if you didn't molest it," she joked. Lavi blushed and smiled. _So she's not as nicee and pleasant as she seems, thats good, we only need one Lenalee around anyway._

The party drew on and night began to creep across the horizon, flooding the sky in ebony. With the darkness there came a chill that seeped in through the open windows. As the night dragged on, more and more left, yawning with red faces and sleepy eyes, to head toward their beds and sleep. Komui had long since fallen asleep at a table, coffee mug grasped tightly in his hand, before Reever came to drag him back to his office, muttering "...lazy ass... waisting time, stupid supervisor." Kanda, the least sociable of them all had long since left, while Allen laid across a table barely woke, remnants of food plastered on his face.

Shante yawned widely, small tears falling from the corners of her eyes. "Maybe you should go to bed," Lavi called from nearby.

The girl stood," Maybe I will, its late and I need to get some rest." She stretched and rubbed her eyes.

Lavi followed her out the doors, insisting he'd with her till he got to his room.

"So sleepy," he yawned, covering his mouth with a hand as they walked down the dark, dimly lit corridor.

"I can give you a lamp so it won't be so dark," Lavi offered, opening his door to his room.

Shante waved her hand,"That's okay. I'll be fine." Lavi arched an eyebrow for reassurance.

"I promise, I happen to like the dark."

At this Lavi raised both eyebrow in curiosity. "Really? Why?"

Shante grinned a little, "because it consumes and hides everything. Its allows you to be yourself, free from reservations. I guess you can say the dark is what really gives you a chance to live and be free."

Lavi tilted his head and blinked. _Wow such deep, yet dark thoughts._

"Wow, that was...deep," he managed to barely say.

The girl smiled coyly, "I managed to have those moments, I'm more than looks you know."

Lavi gaped at her statement before smiling.

"Goodnight...what was it Kanda called you... baka usagi?" she smiled and continued to walk to her room while Lavi smiled waved and shut the door.

"Goodnight," he whispered to himself.

**A/N: Yeah I'm not feeling to happy about that ending, thought it was ok, so I might change it later on. Tell me what ya think**


	4. First Mission and a Slight Hope

**A/N Here you go, another chapter so enjoy! Remember R&R Also I probably should have said this earlier ( I will go back to the first chapter and put it in later) but this story's time frame is after Lulabell's attack. In this story Allen is still under suspicion of being the 14****th (Link will appear later)**** but the Order has not made its move to the Asian branch yet.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own D. Gray Man or its characters. It all belongs to Hoshino Katsura ( so lucky)**

_**Redemption**_

_Then how can you live_

_I still have a heart_

_Really? No matter how corrupted it is?_

_Yes. I happen to embrace my corruption._

_You embrace it because I am your corruption_

"Lavi pay attention" Bookman fussed smacking the young teen across the back of the head.

"Ouch jiiji," Lavi felt his eyes beginning to water. He looked back down at the book trying to pay attention to it and take in what he read but to little avail. His mind kept wondering back to Shante. It had been almost a month since she joined the Order and since day one he felt himself drawn to her. However, he had yet been able to tell if to was because he wished for her friendship or something more. But he did notice the way he took great care to try to make conversations with her and how he had taken in every visible feature of her, including the two intricate tattoos on her back and the thin diamond ring she delicately played with occasionally.

He pondered if she had been married or engaged, but decided that she was too young. 'But then again you never know' he thought silently turning the pages hoping to find something that would draw his thoughts away. He sort of scared himself with his sudden preoccupation with the girl and tried to convince himself that he just wanted to figure her out more; he found her intriguing, as if something else lay hidden beneath the clean, beautiful surface of her outer appearance.

--

Shante' grimaced as she was greeted by the morning sun, playing on her face, blinding her eyes. Rolling over and pulling the covers over her head, a grunt escaped her mouth before she drifted back into slumber. She was a night owl, basking in the vastness and comfort of night; prone to late nights and even later mornings, Shante found the night to be the most welcoming time of the day.

The sudden and rapid knocking on her door yanked the girl from her sleep. A long string of curses escaped her mouth she forced herself out of bed, tired feet dragging themselves to the door.

A rather gleeful and bright face belonging to Lenalee greeted her at the door.

"Good morning Shante, sorry to wake you," the Asian girl started, "but nii-san wants you in his office as soon as possible."

Too tired to speak too much, the other nodded her head and muttered "Okay," before yawning and turning to shut the door.

_C'mon time to wake up_, she told herself before grabbing her things to take a shower. Close to a month had passed since she arrived and one would think she would have grown accustomed to the early mornings at the Black Order; Lenalee put every effort into making sure the new exorcist became well acquainted with things and people at the Order, which including waking up about 8:00 almost everyday to eat breakfast with everyone else.

The warm water poured over her, droplets gliding down her skin in crooked lines till they reached the soles of her feet. The shower was refreshing and equally calming. Last night had unnerved the young woman. Her reoccurring nightmares of _that _night had kept her tossing and turning throughout the night. That was the one thing about the night that she hated: the dreams that it brought along with it.

"_Christopher! Christopher!"_

_Each time she opened her mouth, the girl feel the growing dryness and weakening of her throat. Each shout grew quieter and she felt herself growing light headed, but she pushed forward, feet crushing the snow beneath her. _

_She tightly wrapped her arms around herself to protect her body from the bitter wind that swept across her. In her rush to find her love she had abandoned all thoughts of keeping herself warm and safe, despite having been locked in a closet for 20 minutes.._

"_Where the hell are you?" she muttered to no one. As time went on she could feel the worry and fear in her grow more. Christopher wasn't use to this side of town, he had been brought up in the outskirts of the city, by the woods. In his rage at what she had told him, he had stormed out of her house, off to confront a man she knew to be dangerous, with no morals or reservations. She now found herself blaming herself if anything should happen to him._

"_If I just would have kept my mouth-," _

_Shante stopped in her tracks, clutching her chest as she became overwhelmed at the sight in front of her. There he was, Christopher, a few yards in front of her, turning away from the man that he had sought after. The fact that he was walking away, unharmed, relieved her and a smile spread across her face as she ran to him._

"_Christopher you idiot!," she yelled with outstretched arms. Christopher turned, startled by the sudden sound of her voice. With a twist of his body he was facing her, confusion written on his face._

"_Shante what are you doing here? I told you to stay back," he yelled as she approached, each movement of her feet bringing her closer. _

"_I was worried," tears fell from her eyes, out of joy, anger, or frustration she could not tell._

_Maybe her tears had been a foreshadowing of what was about to happen next. In what seemed like an instance, the forgotten man had closed the gap between him and the young man. A flicker of silver shinned as the man raised his hand and brought it down swiftly, plunging the dagger into his back. A twisted smile spread across his face while Christopher normal bright expression turned into one of utter shock and terror………._

"Ahh, glad you could join us Shante," Komui glanced at her before returning to the papers he had been skimming over for the past few minutes.

Shante, hair still wet from the shower, nodded and glanced around the room for an open seat amid the sea of papers that covered the room. Lavi, Allen, Krory and Kanda had also been there, apparently waiting for her to show up. Quietly she took a seat on the sofa next to the red head. Out of them all she managed to get along with him the most.

"Well about time you woke up lazy," Lavi grinned before turning his attention back to the supervisor.

"Well its no coincidence that I've gathered you all here, so lets get to it!" Komui chimed, pumping a fist in the air. "Misssioon Tiiimmmee!!"

Allen slapped a hand to his forehead, while Kanda scowled even more.

"Rather I have two separate missions for you all. Krory and Kanda will be going to Spain. Allen and Lavi, you all will be going to Turkey in search of innocence; furthermore, I will be sending Shante' along with you."

Shante gulped at the sound of her name. This would be her first official mission. She had fought Akuma before, even taken down a few level two, and she felt comfortable with her Innocence, yet for some reason, the thought of taking on a real mission scared her. Most of her time had been spent getting filled in on the recent happenings in the war after Yeegar's death, including the mission to find the Heart and the intense battle that took place in Edo.

Kanda snorted, "Che. Are you sure you should send a rookie on a mission with the likes of those two idiots?" Shante knew she was knew and not as experienced as the others, seeing as how they took on the Noah, a shit load of Level 3s, and even the Earl himself, but she still mentally threw curses at Kanda for him calling her a "rookie."

Lavi grinned crookedly while Allen frowned and glared.

"I guess the mighty Bakanda can do much better," he huffed. Before the other could respond Lavi spoke up.

"Yuu-chan, you should have more faith in us, we'll keep an eye on her," he clasped a hand on her shoulder.

A small smile crept across Komui's face, "There will be little need to she's almost at an 84 synchronization rate."

Shante shuttered as she remembered the ghost like woman serpent touching her.

The other exorcists stared at her in astonishment. Krory twirled a piece of his short hair, "That's incredibly high for such a new exorcist."

Shante smiled shyly, "I didn't think it was that great though. Plus Hevlaska said it would probably take me some time before my percent increase since it went up so high."

"Besides that, you three will be deporting tonight," Komui cut the conversation short. "You'll be traveling to Istanbul first, and then from there you will take a two day train ride to the area of Izmir. Located there is the ancient city of Ephesus, where it is believed innocence is located due to the strange phenomenon occurring. The entire city has been completely restored to its original appearance."

"That's it?" Allen asked.

"No, there's more. It is also floating close to 200ft off the ground and every Finder that we've sent there has disappeared not too long after. The reason why you three are going is because your Innocence will allow you to reach the city with no problem," he finished before dismissing the three, his mind drifting back to the meeting with Hevlaska.

"_Komui," the living Innocence called._

"_So what about the girl?" he inquired._

_Hevlaska sighed, "This girl... I've never seen such a high synchronization this early. She won't further for a while most likely, but still…Her and her innocence are almost one, but it seems as if something is blocking them."_

_Komui nodded in understanding._

"_Also… there's something else"_

"_What"_

"_This girl, Shante Bonner, she's special. There's something about, something in her that will make her great. We need her on our side, she's a valuable asset to the Order. It's possible for this young woman to make… or break everything we've worked for."_


	5. Of Beauty and Darkness

**A/n: Wow it has been a minute since I updated. Sorry for the wait, I have been real busy with getting things together for school and the homework and everything else has been kicking my ass. I promise I will try to update more often than every other month lol. In fact have the next couple of pieces written out, just need to get them up on the computer faster lol. **

**If you have been reading thanks so much for doing so! I love Reviews, tell me what you think, **

**Disclaimer: I do not own D. Gray-Man or any of its characters. This work is purely fictional.  
**

**_Redemption_**

_Yes. I happen to embrace my corruption._

_You embrace it because I am your corruption_

_Your point...?_

_Why don't you let me go_

_I'll fall to pieces_

_Someone will put you back together again_

_**--**  
_

_We are one in the same...remember_

_No...I'm my ownself, you dont matter anymore_

_Really? Then why am I still here?_

_..._

_Because you can't get rid of me...I'm not going any where..._

Lavi stared out of the compartment window at nothing in particular. As the train drew closer to Turkey, the terrain had grown more mountainous. The train curved and flowed fluidly through the deep valleys. Where there weren't mountains, there were pastures, lush green pastures, some that housed crops. The bright cerulean sky was speckled with clouds here and there, allowing the sun to shine freely without restraints. Turkey was one of the most beautiful countries in the world, along with being one of the most historic ones. Lavi had traveled to the country multiple times with Bookman, mainly on business.

However, on his first trip there, they went to the Hagia Sophia, one of the world's earliest Christian churches. The moment he set foot in the place...the boy had fallen in love with the place

_"Bookman, where are we going?" the young "Joshua" asked, tugging at the old man's sleeve as they maneuvered between people casually talking in the street. The pair looked quite normal to those around, minus the child's eye patch; they just simply looked like a boy and his grandfather.  
_

_"The Hagia Sophia," Bookman replied, eyes forward. The red headed boy followed the old man's gaze and stared at the quickly growing structure ahead of them_

_"Wow! Its huge!" he shouted pointing at it, "And pretty"  
_

_Pretty was an understatement the intelligent boy realized as he followed Bookman inside. The whole interior was filled with golden walls. Multiple arches helped make up the frame of the building. The whole place seemed to glow with a heavenly light._

_Joshua looked on in astonishment, eyes wide in wonder. "Its so beautiful," he whispered before running off to explore. Bookman let a small smile spread across his face 'Best let him be a boy for once, he is just a child after all' he thought watching the little boy playfully bounce between people._

_The child looked at every mosaic he could find, lightly running his small fingers over them, the ancient art sending shivers up his arm. 'I'll remember everything about this place. Not for Bookman or the clan..Bute for me' he thought sweetly, moving to the center of the building._

_The dome had to be the most astonishing part of it all. Arched windows lined the entire base of the dome and sunlight poured in, filling the room with a golden light like none Joshua had ever seen. He playfully spun in place, arms out above his head, basking in the golden light, letting it warm his entire being. He felt so ...so _him_ and not what others wanted him to be. The child smiled widely, gazing up at the golden dome, a single green eye watering._

_He felt a tear roll down his cheek. Initially he thought it was because of the bright light, but he soon realized it wasn't. He was crying because he had never felt this way before from what he could remember. He had never felt so..._

_Free_

_He cried because he had never seen anything so beautiful. It's beauty had freed him from being "Joshua", if only for that moment...He was _himself_. He didn't mind the tears that stained his face, nor didnt try to wipe them away, but continued to spin to his heart's content. The Golden light played on his bright face._

_His green eye sparkled, 'Yes I mus remember everything...forget nothing' he thought._

_'But it will be for me'_

The thought of Lavi's past alias brought a smile to the already playful face that made him "Lavi." "Joshua" had been there, but it was _him_ who had felt everything. He longed to have that experience again, to feel free and alive. Underneath his persona, he willingly sought after it again, it was almost an obsession, his seeking true happiness and freedom. Being a Bookman wouldn't allow him such pleasures of life, as they have no feelings, no real "heart" in a sense, just merely aliases and the stories that laid behind them. Even with the understanding of his job, Lavi still had hopes, dreams, and feelings, just like those he recorded. He was human after all...why shouldn't he?

Lavi's smile widened, teeth barely showing.

"Lavi what are you smiling at?" Shante asked. Allen had long since fallen asleep. Lavi turned and grinned even wider, scratching the back of his head, cocking it to the side.

"Hmmm, a beautiful thought just crossed my mind...thats all." Shante mimicked his motion, but here face held confusion. Not feelings the need to press on, she gave a quiet "Oh" before returning her gaze back to the passing landscape. Lavi was expectant of her reaction, but merely let his gaze go out of the window as well.

Out of all the exorcists, Shante found Lavi to be the one she got along the most with, despite the little time they spent together (most of it was cut into by Bookman, along with a smack to the back of Lavi's head). Sure Lenalee was nice, and along with Allen, thats who the girl spent the majority of her time with, but at times they could be_ too _nice. Miranda, she found, was an all around mess when it came to just about everything. Marie was sweet, and Krory was just... Krory. And Kanda...what wasn't there to say about the ill-mannered samurai. She may have even beaten Allen in number of arguments they've had.

But Lavi... there was something about him that made him impossible not to like. She found that he understood her bestfor the little time that she had been apart of the order. He didnt ask a thousand and one questions about her like everyone else seem to do. He understood that when she felt like opening up, she would.

Lavi periodically looked out of the corner of his eyes at the girl, despite tying to refrain himself from doing so. _'Have a little self control Lavi' _he thought to himself when he found he had done it for the tenth time in the past couple of minutes. He caught glimpes of her nodding off with heavy eyes. He lightly chuckled to himself, low enough for her not to hear. She moved to position her self comfortably and unconsciously fumbled with her large bangle, moving it just enough that Lavi caught a glimpse of the vertical dark vertical scar.

His grin faded as he tilted his head slightly, squinting his eye to look at it more. He bit his lip as he felt his heart skip a beat at the realization of what the scar was. _' She slight her wrist the wrong way,'_ he thought feeling his mouth grow dry. _'So beauty does have a dark side.'_ Why was the first thought that crossed his mind. Feeling as though he was looking into a private part of her life, he quickly looked away, trying to push what he saw from his mind.

Shante felt her heart race as she watched through near closed eyes as Lavi looked away from her wrist, but remained silent and still, pretending to be sleep.

What seemed like ages later, the trio unloaded from the train, setting foot in Istanbul. Tim fluttered about wildly with excitement.

"Oi, Allen whats up with Tim? Why's he so damn hyper?" Lavi asked, eye brow raised after recieving a few slaps of the golem's wings in the face while it fluttered carelessly.

Allen shrugged, "I've got no clue, maybe because he's been here before and likes it?"

Lavi snorted and grabbed Timcannpy out the air," There's plenty of stray cats around here, I'm pretty sure one of them would like a nice golfball to chew on..."

"Lavi you ass!" Allen cried, snatching the golem away from the older as they walked through the train station.

Shante chuckled lightly, she had rarely heard Allen curse and found his break in his usual well-mannered behavior funny.

Lavi glanced at her and upon meeting his gaze her eyes quickly took interest in a nearby poster on the wall. She felt somewhat upset at him seeing her scar, though it had been her fault. She tried so hard to hide it since she came to the Order and had been successful, until now. Her facade was starting to become flawed.

Lavi put a hand on her shoulder and smiled lightly, "Whats wrong rookie?"

Shante returned her gaze and smiled, "Oh nothing. I'm fine."

"You sure? Cause I might be wrong but it looked like you didnt want to look me in the eye," Lavi stated, pouting a little.

"What!?"

"I mean, its okay, I am quite handsome and I do have that effect on women. Its okay."

"You concieted little thing!"

Lavi laughed, putting a arm around her shoulder, ruffling her hair, "What? I'm just stating facts!"

**A/N: Yep, i'm not too pleased with this chapter, its makes things seem to go slow and I dont know...its ok I guess. However, I really did enjoy writing Lavi's flashback. It will get better and pick up in the next chapter. But tell me what ya think Read and Review**


	6. Two Lost Souls

**A/N: Here's the next chapter! Read and Review people! lol**

**Disclaimer: D. Gray Man belongs to Hishino Katsura**

_**Redemption**_

_Someone will put you back together again_

_No... your the only one_

_You dont need me anymore, let go_

_I might not need you but i want you_

_What about him? He'll put you together again_

_---  
_

_Because you can't get rid of me...I'm not going any where_

_Yes...Yes I will_

_The day you do is the day we both die_

_I can live without you, you need me to survive_

_Ha what will you be then without me? You'll have no purpose  
_

"Allen…shouldn't you slow down?" Shante asked chewing a piece of lamb. Allen's hunger had kicked into overdrive from the long train ride and the teen was scarfing down close to 20 more plates of a wide variety of Turkish cuisine.

"Mope," he replied through stuffed cheeks, Tim nibbling his left overs.

Lavi finished the lest of his chish kebab and said, "You know your not use to eating this type of food, it might not agree with your bottomless pit of a stomach."

"Everything agrees with my stomach," Allen said before taking a long drink of _Ayran_. The two watched as he finished the cup in under five seconds and waved to the waiter for another one.

"How can you _drink _that so easily?" the girl pondered aloud. She had been barely able to drink any of the yogurt, water, and salt mixture called _Aryan_. It resembled milk and tasted nothing like it. Upon Allen's request the trio had ordered the drink in an attempt to try something "new." Allen loved it, while the other two retreated back to their water.

"What? Its good," the youngest replied.

Shante shook her head and returned to eating her dessert: a fried pastry baked in syrup called _kadayif_. Lavi leaned back in his chair, looking full and satisfied.

"Okay, well don't come complaining to us when your shittin all day." Shante chuckled and Allen frowned.

After eating their fill at the Inn, the group headed up to their rooms. It was still early in the day and their finder wouldn't be there till the next day to catch the train with them to Izmir. They decided to do some sightseeing with out excorsist uniforms to avoid attention if their were any akuma or Noah near by.

"Are you ready?" Shante stepped into the boys' room, fully changed. She wore a cream colored blouse, with frills around the buttons. She opted to wear pants instead of a skirt in case of an unexpected battle. Her plaited hair was loose and spilled over her shoulders and back.

Lavi sat on his bed shaking his head and pointed toward the bathroom.

"Oh"

Allen could be clearly seen hunched over the tiolet holding his stomach.

"It just keeps coming," he whined and loud, suggesting splashes came after, followed by coughing. Shante walked over to the bathroom, the smell of vomit assaulting her nostrils. Scrunching her face she squatted down to rub the youngster's back.

"Poor thing." She threw a slight frown over her back at Lavi.

"Oww, I feel terrible," Allen's hair was wild and his face red and sweaty, his icy grey eyes held pools of water in them.

"Told you moyashi," Lavi said, grinning and removing his headband, flaming hair falling around his face.

"My name is Allen!" he growled, glaring at his friend.

"At least its not the other end..."

"Shut up!"

Shante put a wet rag to the child's forehead, "Lavi leave him alone" She helped him up and laid him on the bed. "You stay in bed and try to drink some tea...or something that won't mess with that stomach of yours" She pulled the covers over him. His innocent face looked so sweet, bringing a smile to her face.

"We'll stay here with you," she assured. Lavi frowned. He had been dying to roam the city since they first received news of the mission. Now Moyashi was fucking it up.

"No, you two go ahead, I'll be fine. I've been here with Master...(his face looked queasy ) before so I've seen everything there is to see. You two have fun, "Allen smiled sincerely and waved them off.

Lavi let a small grin play on his face.

"But-" Shante protested.

"If somethings wrong I'll sen Tim to get you guys"

Satisfied, Shante muttered "okay" before turning to Lavi.

"See Allen's fine, its impossible for anything to be wrong with Allen permanately. The way he can bounce back from anything is weird." Lavi assured, grabbing the girl's hand and headed toward the door.

Once the door shut, Allen turned to Timcannpy who had taken a seat on the pillow beside his head.

"I told you it would work," he teased pulling a tiny bottle from his pocket, waving it.The drink, made courtesy of the science department of the Order, had done its job in making Allen sick temporarily. Still feeling nauseous he grinned before rolling over to sleep for a while.

**In the City**

Istanbul was perhaps the most crowded cities the young woman had ever been to. There were people bustling about everywhere, stands with people selling corn, bread, and nuts. She loved how friendly everyone was but held onto Lavi's hand so as not to get lost.

"I told you this city is great," Lavi teased as they headed toward the square. It was the historical center of Istanbul, called Stamboul; the Blue Mosque , Topkapi Palace, and the Hagia Sophia were all located in it. A wonderful fountain surrounded by a park stood in the middle of it all. Reaching the open park, Lavi felt her hand slide out of his as she ran to the fountain. Lavi followed.

"Its gorgeous," she said touching the water. It was lukewarm and crystal clear.

Lavi shrugged, putting his hands behind his head, "I've seen better." He grinned, then smiled once the girl realized what, or rather who, he was referring to. He sat down in the edge of the fountain while Shante sat on the grass, her arm over the edge, fingertips lightly touching the water. Lavi watched as she made invisible designs in the water. He smiled, enjoying the way she appreciated the simple things in life, which he had little time to do. He soon found himself dipping his fingers into the fountain, his hand barely touching hers.

Shante looked up at the older teen and grinned slightly. He smiled back and let his pinky hook onto hers. She wanted to move her hand, but felt compelled by something else to leave it there.

"Lavi?" the girl called. The red head met her eyes. "What is it rookie?"

Shante flicked water onto his face, "Thats Ms. Bonner to you baka usagi"

Lavi grinned, "You know, you and Yuu are more alike than you think. You both tend to use foul language," he arched an eyebrow at this. " And your even starting to call me the same thing he does"

Shante shrugged beating back the urge to curse at the moment at being compared to the insufferable raven-haired teen.

"But no, what is it?" he asked.

Shante squinted her eyes, blocking the reflection of the sun from the water. "Where are you from?" She had always pondered the young man's origins. She knew Allen was British the moment he opened his mouth, Marie still had a slight French accent, and the others had told her their origins. But Lavi...out of the time they had become friends, never mentioned his.

Lavi bit his lip and stared at nothing in particular. His pinky tightened around hers. "To be honest...I dont know" Shante felt guilty for bringing the question up when she saw the distant look on his face.

"I'm sorry I didnt mean to upset you," she apologized. Lavi waved his had, "Its okay" He looked distant again.

"I can remember my mother, a little" he admitted. Shante looked at him, intent on learning more about him.

Lavi closed his green eye. "I had to be no more than five or six. It was raining. We were walking, to where I dont know. I dont remember the country either. I remember holding onto her hand while we pushed past people. I remember our clothes were...whats the best way to say this? Shitty, so its safe to say we were poor. We walked into a inn or something like it... she sat me down and looked me in the eyes. I can't remember her face clearly, but I do remember her eyes. They were the same color as mines..."

_The woman gazed into her son's eyes, moving his damp red hair out of his face. The child's bright green eyes were bright with life. He sat swinging his legs and smiled._

_"Momma..what are we doing here?" he asked. He had always been an inquisitive child. The woman, no older than her mid twenties smiled through hurt eyes._

_"Were going to get something to eat and stay for a while," she lied. The woman felt her heart break as he wrapped his arms around her neck, pulling her into a loving hug._

_"Thanks momma!" he pulled back and saw tears streaming down her face._

_"Why...why are you crying?" he asked, concerned for his mother. She quickly wiped them away and stood up. _

_"Oh its nothing. Don't worry yourself my little one," she ruffled his hair. He frowned, knowing something was wrong. "Momma..?"_

_She quieted him with a finger, "Shh dont fret. Now I'm going to clean up. I'll be right back."_

_The red head nodded, but felt like crying. He didn't like the way she said "right back." Something was wrong. Terribly wrong. _

_"You promise?"_

_She bit her lip and squeezed his hand, "I promise"_

_Standing she turned and walked toward the rest room. The younger "Lavi" sat, looking around the room with anticipation, impatiently waiting for her return. He sat swinging his legs and twirling his thumbs around each other._

_The young woman stood, hidden behind a wall near the rest room which was close to the exit. Hot tears spilled down her face as she gripped her shawl. She didnt want to, but she knew it must be done. She could no longer take care of him. He was intelligent and wonderful, he deserved a better life. Someone would take him in, she was sure of it. _

_She watched as he fidgeted impatiently waiting on her. No longer able to look at him, she pulled the shawl on her head and turned , running out of the door._

_"I'm sorry Jacob"_

_Little Jacob sat waiting for minutes. The minutes grew longer and longer. Many customers came and asked him why he was alone, but he smiled and said he wasn't, that his mother would be back soon._

_"She's coming" he kept telling himself. "She wouldnt leave me"_

_The minutes turned into hours and as the day drew on the crowd of the inn began to get smaller, he finally faced the reality of what happened. He sobbed uncontrollably, putting his head down. _

_'She left me...momma left me' he told himself. He curled up into a ball in the chair he sat in, wishing he could disappear or be where she was. The owner of the inn walked over and knelt in front of him._

_"Son are you alright?" he asked. Jacob said nothing, but looked up through tear stained eyes. When the owner asked where his mother and father were, he lost it. His cries could be heard from outside. The owner scooped him up into his arms while the child cried, fisting the man's shirt._

_"She left me..she left me...she promised...she promised...you promised!"_

Shante was left at a lost for words as he ended his story. She gripped his hand, showing her sadness of what had happened to him. Lavi squeezed just as hard, still looking distant. Shante didnt know if she should cry or hug him.

"After that, I can't remember anything really, its all a blurr. My next clear memory that I have is when Gramps took me from some orphanage." he admitted.

Shante pulled him into a warm hug. Taken off guard slightly, Lavi smiled and wrapped his arms around her while she buried her face in his chest.

"Thank you."

Shante pulled back and stared up at him. Sitting on the edge like him, her face grew serious.

"Well if it helps, I have no clue where I come from either. You can remember your mother some. I dont remember a damn thing about my parents. I just remember always being on my own for a long time." She had been an orphan for who knows how long. From her earliest memory of living in New York, for a while she didnt even know how old she was. There were a couple of others like her, they lived on the streets, they all looked out for each other, but she didnt consider them to be family. No money, so they stole everything they needed, occasionally sneaking into the basement of buildings and vacant houses for shelter.

Lavi was stunned at her openness. She had been so close mouthed when it came to her past.

"I had gramps to help me through. How'd you make it?" he asked.

Shante chuckled, "I met Christopher and his family." Lavi saw the a hint of pain in her eyes at the mention of them.

"They took me in... I was like a daughter to them, they were the only family that I ever had." Lavi saw the hurt in her expression grow and grabbed her hands and held it between his two. She seemed to appreciate his show of concern but she pulled her hands back, taking Lavi by suprise.

"I'm sorry its just-" she began but he cut her off. "Its okay, I understand" he nodded. Instead he left his hand rest next to hers, barely touching them. Shante had never spoken to anyone about her life before the Order. _No one._ And here she came close to pouring everything out to Lavi. And that scared her more than anything

Wanting to cheer her up, he hooked his arm around hers and stood. "Well we're having a good time so, lets not make the mood depressing by talking about this. We can save that for another day."

Shante nodded, cheering up somewhat. "Where too then?"

Lavi thought, finger to his chin. " Aha! The Hagia Sophia, its right over there!" He grabbed hold of her hand, this time she didnt object and led the way across the park.

**Hagia Sophia**

"You know alot about this place , huh?" Shante noted, slender hands running along the golden walls.

"Yeah its one of my favorite places. Jijji brought me here when I was younger. I fell in love with the place, "Lavi admitted. Shante stared at Lavi, slightly surprised he found sentimental value in this place.

"What? Didn't think I could like a place like this?" he asked. The girl shook her head, a smirk planted on her face. "You dont seem to be the sentimental kind of guy."

Lavi chuckled. The girl had a point. Those around Lavi would say the same thing. Thats what they failed to understand "Bookman Junior" was slowly starting to fade since the Ark incident. Though it was true Lavi had no time for the little things in life, Bookman Junior only viewed things as information, the important or not, history for the books. "Lavi," who seemed to be taking over, basked in the ideas of life and love as well as everything that came with it.

"Well I just so happen to _love_ it and find it to be very beautiful," the eighteen year-old chimed, feeling his cheeks turn red slightly.

Shante poked his cheek, " I think its sweet." Lavi smiled and grabbed the girl by the hand.

"C'mon" he ordered, leading her under the dome.

"Stand right...here," he told her, positioning her directly beneath the center of the dome.

"Now look up," he stood behind her and pointed upward. Shante smiled at the scene before her; light flooded in from every direction at the dome, reflecting against the golden interior.

"Wow," was all she could muster. Lavi, pleased with her reaction, smiled.

"I told you so."

**A/N: I rather enjoyed writing this chapter. I finally got to get into the Romance part a little bit. Once again loved writing Lavi's flashback (almost made me cry). Shante's past, yeah, figuring out hos I can get the majority of it to come up soon so you guys can understand why she puts on a facade so much. but yeah. keep reading**


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